|
 This page seeks to answer the most frequently asked questions
about Christian burial. The Church wants to help Christians prepare for
their own deaths, and to help friends and family facing the challenge of
burying someone they love. Please know that our clergy and staff are
friendly resources who are here to assist you in any way they can.
Dying is the process of returning to the earth from which we came,
and of turning toward God from whom we came. Death is the sacramental
moment of our returning. At burial, the Christian community gathers to
celebrate its faith.
The burial is an Easter liturgy. It finds all its meaning in the
Resurrection. Because Jesus was raised from the dead, Christians, too,
will be raised. Christian burial reflects joy in the certainty that
“neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities, nor things
present nor things to come, nor powers nor height nor depth, nor
anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love
of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:38) We offer prayers for the
dead, entrusting them to God's love and mercy.
Alongside our Resurrection hope, our human grief remains. The very
love we have for each other in Christ brings deep sorrow when we are
parted by death. Jesus himself wept at the grave of his friend. So while
we give thanks for the Resurrection of Christ, which enfolds us all, we who continue in this life grieve our loss. Therefore our
liturgy also asks God to comfort those who mourn.
The Book of Common Prayer notes that Christians are normally buried from
their parish church. This implies that either their bodies, or their
cremated remains, will be present for the burial liturgy, and then
committed to a permanent place of rest. Our physical bodies, Scripture
tells us, are temples of the Holy Spirit, visible signs of our spiritual
presence in the world. It is fitting that they be honored in Christian
burial.
In Anticipation of Death
Our society routinely avoids speaking about death, but the Church
does not. Over the centuries we have gathered Scriptures, songs, and
prayers which enfold the pain and trauma of separation and loss within a
larger vision. The Church is not afraid to speak of death because we are
a community of faith, hope, and love.
It is prudent to begin thinking about your own funeral well
beforehand. Thoughtful foresight allows the liturgy to express your
Christian faith authentically while helping family and friends
understand your personal wishes. The parish clergy are pleased to meet
with you to review the options available for prayers, hymns, and
Scripture readings appropriate for burial.
It is also prudent to discuss with your physician, and put into
writing, the types of medical treatment that you desire in case of
debilitating illness.
At the Time of Death
Before making any arrangements for the body, please confirm with the
clergy what services will be needed from a mortician. Often these are
fewer than expected.
People's Memorial Association in Seattle (206-325-0489) is a nonprofit
organization that provides simple, affordable services. More elaborate
arrangements can be made with the funeral homes listed in the telephone
directory or online.
A bulletin listing the order of service, as well as the names of pall
bearers, readers, ushers and others assisting with the service, will be
prepared by the parish office. A second brochure from the mortuary is
not needed. The parish will also arrange for musicians when requested by
the family to do so.
The parish clergy, organist, and staff are here to help you with all
aspects of planning and celebrating Christian burial. Please call on us
whenever the need arises.
About the Funeral
The church is the appropriate place for funerals. It is customary for
the remains to be present for the service, either in an urn (for ashes)
or a coffin.
Flowers are symbols of resurrection and are always appropriate at
funerals. However, since urns and caskets are covered with a cloth
called a pall, which symbolizes our equality before God in death (and
recalls the white garment of baptism), floral casket sprays are not
used. A family arrangement may be placed at the urn or on a stand near
the altar. Additional floral displays are unnecessary, but if they are
delivered to the church, they may be placed on the shelves in the
narthex (entry hall). Flowers from the narthex or the stand in the
church may be taken to the cemetery. Flowers are also appropriate at the
reception or delivered to the family, but many families prefer to
recommend charities, including St. Thomas, that well-wishers may want to
support instead of giving flowers.
The family usually gathers in the parish Conference Room before the
service, although some prefer to be seated in the front pews as they
arrive. At the appointed time, the procession forms in the narthex, led
by the crucifer. The family is appropriately included in the procession.
You will find several forms for the Burial of the Dead in the Book of
Common Prayer on pages 468-507. It is appropriate for family members to
participate in leading the service by reading lessons or prayers.
The Eucharist (Holy Communion) is an appropriate part of the service,
making the funeral similar to Sunday services at St. Thomas. All
baptized persons are welcome to receive the Sacrament at this special
time, an occasion of solidarity and solace for all who grieve. Sharing
Communion among those who mourn is itself an occasion for comfort and
hope, and it reminds us again of the Heavenly Banquet which surpasses
all limits of time and space. In the Eucharist all Christians, the
living and dead together, join in celebrating the Resurrection of Jesus.
Eulogies are not customary in the Episcopal Church. The focus of
Christian burial is properly on Christ's victory over the powers of
darkness and death. It is an Easter service. Since those present already
know the one who has died, review of years past is not necessary. If it
is desired to share such remembrances they may best take place at a
reception following the service.
At the conclusion of the service, it is customary for the family to
follow the crucifer and clergy out in procession. If the Committal takes
place in the St. Thomas columbarium, the family goes to the columbarium
for the Committal, while the guests go to the Great Hall for the
reception. If the burial is in a local cemetery, the family and guests
follow the funeral coach there in procession.
A Word About Cremation
Cremation, an ancient practice anthropologists have discovered in
many ages and places past, is gaining popularity in our day. St. Thomas
has a columbarium for the convenience of members of the parish and
community who may wish to use it for loved ones or themselves.
Accordingly, we treat the deceased body reverently, not simply out of
respect for the departed person, but out of reverent awe in the presence
of God’s handiwork. Whether we burn or bury the body, it passes from our
sight, but it can never pass from God’s sight.
Planning for Death: a checklist
- Keep your will current, with copies on file in both your
attorney’s office and your safe deposit box, and in the parish safe,
if you wish.
- Designate the charitable organizations to which friends and
family may donate in memory of your life and work. It is always
appropriate to include your parish church.
- Select a funeral home and a place for burial; the St. Thomas
staff is happy to discuss parish Columbarium niches and other
choices with you.
- Arrange with your physician for a Living Will; discuss it with
your family; leave a copy with your doctor, in your safe deposit
box, in your attorney’s office, and at the church.
- Meet with the parish clergy to plan your funeral liturgy ahead
of time.
- Review this brochure and the arrangements you have made with
trusted friends and family.
Options for Scripture Readings during the Service
Old Testament Readings
- Isaiah 25:6-9 [He will swallow up death forever]
- Isaiah 61:1-3 [To comfort those who mourn]
- Lamentations 3:22-26, 31-33 [The Lord is good to those who wait
for him]
- Wisdom 3:1-5, 9 [The souls of the righteous are in the hand of
God]
- Job 19:21-27a [I know that my Redeemer lives]
New Testament Readings
- Romans 8:14-19, 34-35, 37-39 [The glory that shall be revealed]
- 1 Corinthians 15:20-26, 35-38, 42-44, 53-58 [The imperishable
body]
- 2 Corinthians 4:16-5:9 [Things that are unseen are eternal]
- 1 John 3:1-2 [We shall be like him]
- Revelation 7:9-17 [God will wipe away every tear]
- Revelation 21:2-7 [Behold, I make all things new]
Gospel Readings
- John 5:24-27 [He who believes has everlasting life]
- John 6:37-40 [All that the Father gives me will come to me]
- John 10:11-16 [I am the good shepherd]
- John 11:21-27 [I am the resurrection and the life]
- John 14:1-6 [In my Father’s house are many rooms]
Receptions in the Great Hall
We are pleased to offer the Great Hall as a place for family and
friends to gather following the burial liturgy. The family may bring
prepared foods to the church, or we will provide the names of caterers
familiar with holding receptions at St. Thomas to assist the family in
the reception. The parish has tables and chairs, dishes, and flatware
available for use. Should the family require assistance with setup and
clean-up, an hourly fee for the sexton is asked when the reception is
held outside the sexton’s normal work hours. Our Parish Administrator,
Judy Crunkilton, would be pleased to answer any questions and/or assist
you in the preparation of a reception.
Guidelines for Florists
Flowers are symbols of resurrection, so they are always appropriate
at Church funerals.
The parish Flower Guild is responsible for the main floral display at
the church. It is placed in front of the pulpit and remains there
following the service.
The family may place an arrangement at the urn or on a stand near the
altar. Additional floral displays are unnecessary, but if they are
delivered to the church, they may be placed on the shelves in the
narthex (entry hall).
Honoraria and Donations
Organist (Includes consultation with family): $200
Flowers: $200
All contributions for services should be paid at the parish office
within five days of the service. | 
